Tag Archives: love

Don’t just “treat yoself” … Love yoself!

It’s #TreatYourselfTuesday and in honor of that I wanted to reflect on this whole idea of “loving ourselves.”

What does it really mean to you? I feel like I definitely get off the “I love myself” track sometimes, and so often because I start to care too much about the approval of others.

But when I start to let that go, things really start to shift.

I think Melody Beattie says it beautifully…

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Moving Away from Negative Self-Talk (and toward LOVE)

How often are we judgmental toward ourselves? We can be hard on ourselves about a great number of things. One thing we are particularly consistent at being judgmental about is our appearance. I think most everyone can relate in some capacity and what I’d like to share is how I move away from the negative self-talk.benice

The self-loathing includes but is not limited to hating our skin, hating the size of our feet, the fat around our belly, or the cellulite in our thighs. This applies to everyone – all shapes and sizes. To some degree, we are all familiar with negative body image, and verbally beating ourselves up.

The thing that gets me the most is that while getting lost in this verbal attack on myself, I start to feel physically ill.  My body temperature rises, nausea sets in, maybe even a headache. And how often do we try to fix this with a bowl of cereal, a hershey kiss, or an extra diet soda? How often do we turn to food for comfort, as if any of this will magically make all of our imperfections disappear? Or at the very least we try to distract ourselves for the 30 seconds it takes to devour that chocolate kiss.

I have battled with this for years. However, after years of practice, I’m much better at putting my internal bullies to rest. Trust me, I know what it feels like – when your mind really goes for a ride, telling yourself things you wouldn’t DREAM of saying to anyone else. So, how do we stop it?

Let’s compare the obsessive negative self-talk result of feeling physically low to when I get a migraine. Neither one feels good and yet I am very familiar with both. With migraines I know that there are things I need to avoid such as eating tomato sauce and doing too many chatturangas in yoga. I choose to avoid these things because I know the ramifications are just terrible. The same thing happens with this negative self-talk. I will start to go down the road of putting myself down, whether it be in the swimming pool, in front of a mirror, or even out to dinner. However I know that if I stay on this road and keep bashing myself, I’m going to feel terrible both mentally AND physically. I want to avoid this result so I have trained myself to turn around and run away from the negativity.  In order to do this I picture I am stopping myself in my tracks, IMMEDIATELY. Imagine you are running to catch a bus, and all of a sudden you realize you forgot your wallet at home and have to stop short immediately. What do you do? You turn around … and run in the other direction!

Run in the other direction

Run in the other direction

I remind myself of how horrible it feels to go down that path of self-criticism. In order to “turn in the other direction”, I will say positive affirmations to myself. This can feel corny and really challenging at first but, the more I do it (ex: “You are strong and stunning!” or “I am enough”) the easier it becomes. It is like training a muscle: everything shakes and hurts at first but the more you strengthen it, the more work it can do.

This may sound simple, so much so that you are thinking “it’ll never work.” And trust me, there are multiple practices I use to combat these internal bullies. But give it a try and start to train yourself out of that path of self-doubt and run toward love.

How do YOU deal with negative self-talk? Do you have any strategies you call upon? If so, I’d love to hear them! Please email, leave a comment on FB, or my blog.

 

 

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Kale+Shitake+Avocado = LOVE

I am kicking myself right now for not taking a photo of today’s lunch: Sautéed Kale, Shitake, and Shallots Salad with Avocado, and Hard-boiled egg. Using ingredients I had on hand, I created what I would consider an incredibly delicious and quite healthy (and easy!!!) meal.

It’s great for winter because it’s warm. It also took me less than 20 minutes to put together so it works well when you’re in a time crunch!

Here’s what you need (serves one):

1/2 head of kale, roughly chopped or torn into pieces (the stems: you can take them or leave them)
1 shitake mushroom, chopped
1 small shallot, finely chopped
1/2 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp turmeric
1/2 lemon
1 tbsp olive oil

1 egg
1/2 avocado

Here’s what you need to do:

Prepare egg (or eggs) in water to hard-boil. For instructions on how to do this, click here. I would definitely recommend doing this and THEN chop the shallots and shitake since it takes about 15-18 min to hard boil.

Pour olive oil into pan and sauté shallot and shitake with cumin and turmeric for 3-4 minutes. Add kale until it starts to soften. Add fresh lemon juice, stir, and remove from heat. Transfer to your favorite bowl or dish and top with avocado, egg, and season with salt and pepper and extra olive oil if needed.

Please accept this in place of an actual image of my food.

Please accept this in place of an actual image of my food.

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